Natural Hair Thugging: Why Are You Throwing Shade on Your Relaxed Friends??

Natural Hair Thugging:  Why Are You Throwing Shade on Your Relaxed Friends?

By:  Lauren Francis-Jackson

 

 

Even though you may be fulled enthralled in team natural, perhaps not all of your gal pals are team natural.  I have many good friends whom I love dearly who do not share my enthusiasm for natural hair.  They can appreciate the love of natural hair, and may even like the looks on other people however it may not be for them.  No biggie, right?  This can be a big deal for some women-- they want their friends to share in the love of team natural!  They are the ones screaming "Creamy Crack is whack" and spouting all kinds of crazy facts about why relaxers are the devil.  Really boo?!?  Weren't you relaxed three years ago?  Haha-- I'm just saying this can be a true story.  The reality is that there is nothing wrong with some of your friends rocking a relaxer!  Some women may prefer the chemically straightened look, and it works for them.  Totally cool with it because it is a woman's individual choice in how to rock her tresses.  My motto does say, "...Rock it YOUR way!"

 

My thoughts on this topic arose from a conversation I had with a college girlfriend.  She was my girl in college and still is to this day!  We were hanging tough in undergrad!  We went to many campus parties, laughed at many funny stories about dating, and shared many lunches at eateries on campus.  Well at the time both of us were slaves to the creamy crack, and now I'm natural and she is not.  In our conversation today, we began to talk about hair.  I happened to mention being excited about getting in the water this summer (hopefully--locks better get settled before beach season :-), and she spoke about being in dire need for a relaxer.  She made comments like, "You know I can't get in the water!  Gotta get my hair ready for that!" and "Yeah I can't do the natural thing-- this new growth gotta get tamed!"  I just laughed and smiled?  Why you ask-- it is as simple as this:  I love my natural hair wholeheartedly, however I realize it is not for every woman.  There is nothing wrong with that because hair is just hair!  Your hair-- it is your choice to wear it the way you want to.  No need to throw shade-- do you boo!! 

So as the conversation went on I began to see some similarities in our hair story:  she worries about the presentation and look to her hair, and so do I!  I always want to know the sisterlocks are on point! Then she began talking about how she has to schedule her appointment to get a roller set.  I definitely keep my retightening appointments come rain, sleet, snow, monsoon, tsunami, etc.. (well maybe not that tsunami)!  And she ended by saying, "Will this 'what to do with my hair' struggle ever end?"  Even though I may have wanted to say something else, I just said yeah girl you know the struggle is real!  While we have different thoughts on how to wear our hair, we agree that it is important to us as a reflection of who we are!  So don't throw shade on your girlfriend-- instead look for the ways that your hair is the same yet different!

Do you feel that you throw shade on your girlfriends who are not natural?  To the ladies who wear relaxers do you ever feel isolated or rejected by your natural hair rocking friends?

~The Sisterlocked Diva